I just want to be able. Able to bounce back, say “I’m good, I’m talented, I’m a God created GIFT to the world, this shit happens but it’s not the end of anything at all.”
I’m carrying 35lbs today because I bought two books. One for my best friend, since she asked, and one for me, because I tend to buy things when I’m feeling kind of like shit. I clean and I buy, typical American woman style. Or maybe Asian American. I clean and I buy for me.
I am a really bad artist. In the sense that I really do not remember what I draw a lot of the time. Looking back, it’s horrible to see the mistakes. I may be doing the same things over and over.
My favorite art period is Art Deco. I have no idea why, maybe something about the 1930s to 1940s (other than war and depression) was pretty awesome, stylistically.
Openbox is pretty cool. I’ve got a setup with Openbox, Trayer, Tint, Noteo, Xcompmgr (need shadows :P). Totally dropped Compiz, who needs effects when I need to GTD? That and I want quick and snappy. With my integrated ATI Radeon Xpress 1150 card, that’s definitely not possible. It supposedly supports Vista Aero, but hahahahaha oh god no it doesn’t.
I’m a skeptic by nature. I’m a cynic, I’m pretty bitter, and I usually think humanity mostly sucks. Time and time again, I know in the end this lack of faith in the world around me is just because I don’t believe in myself. Or something.
We said our goodbyes all ready, he didn’t think I should wake up to say goodbye. I held up better than he did, I think. He’s got the longest journey ahead of him.
And I’m just the selfish little sister that wants him to stay.